I read the book of Esther 3 times as we were told to do. I kept searching for a certain verse that would impact me differently than the others. However, there were not specific verses, or any statements that were made that impacted me, it was actually the lack of them. I will attmept to clarify.

Esther was raised as a young woman who had lost all her immediate family, was torn away from her uncle, and placed in a palace where she may have very well ended up as a servant. As I continued reading I could not help but wonder how I would have reacted had I been in her situation. I felt bad for her, wondering if maybe she had planned out a future for herself before all of this happened. I wondered if maybe she had her own dreams, and special desires that could now never be fulfilled. I finally read through for the third time, with the same thought process only to realize, never once, did it say "and Esther complained". I never read "Esther then doubted God". Throughout all of the trials she faced, she kept on going. She kept her faith. Even when she felt as though she were blindly walking, she did not falter in her trust.

This is not the typical message I get when I read or hear the story of Esther, but it was something that I definitely needed to catch onto. Esther allowed God to wreck her. She let Him wreck everything she had ever known until all that was left was for her to collide into Him.